Coaching Corner: Pretend You Know
I have a very high success rate with this strategy
Over the last many years, I’ve spent a lot of time feeling like a beginner, in particular when it comes to entrepreneurship and various forms of creative work.
It’s easy to use one’s beginner/inexperienced status as a reason (or excuse) to stay stuck. To tell yourself, “I’m unqualified to figure this out!”
There’s no shame in googling, or YouTubing to find an answer. Or using your favorite AI tool.
But I have another strategy that I lean on that I try to use first: pretending I do know.
Here’s how it works:
“If I were to pretend I did know how to X, or if I pretended I was experienced in X, what would my next step be?”
Odds are, you’ll come up with a reasonable next step. Will it be the “correct” or “best” solution? Maybe, maybe not. But it will likely be good enough to get you moving.
Here’s why I like this approach:
Action in general tends to be better than non-action. Action also leads to course-correction, whereas non-action does not.
Rather than recirculating a message to your self/sub-conscious that is focused on a lack of solution (“I can’t do this”, “I’m stuck”, etc.), asking yourself a productive question will produce a positive response of some kind from your subconscious and again, it’s probably not a half-bad idea. Just pretend your subconscious is an AI and give it a good prompt! (also, it’s way better than AI!)
Many of us can easily give advice to others, whereas it feels harder to help ourselves. So let’s practice! This is one of my go-to tools for “self-coaching” - trying to see myself a bit more from the outside and provide the type of encouragement and guidance I’d offer to someone else. Just as I believe a client is capable of finding their own best answer to a challenge, this helps me practice that trust with myself.
I believe that if we are drawn to a particular path or goal, there is some part of us that already can identify or energetically resonate with being successful in that arena - even if another (maybe even larger) part of us identifies with not being good enough, talented enough, experienced enough, etc to be successful in that way. Using this approach helps make that part of you a little stronger and louder.
Now of course, am I saying that this is the approach for every possible problem? No. Use good judgement. Sometimes you should just call in the expert ASAP.
But for the creative or entrepreneurial process, I like this approach.
So if you’re feeling like you can’t move forward because you don’t know enough, you don’t know how, or you wish someone who knew better (an “expert!”) could just tell you what to do…
What if you pretended you knew, see what ideas emerge as a result, and just try one of those? What have you got to lose?
My step-grandmother used to say, “If I were a pair of scissors, where would I be?” We used to think she was silly.
Until I got older. Now questions like that, or “If I needed to get rid of weeds, what should I do” make such a good first step. Asking out loud. Forcing your brain to focus.